Your hermeneutics are a wonderful example of cherry-picking. Go to Leviticus 18 and cast your mind back 30+ centuries. First, there was barely any notion of marital romance (IF any!) Second, free adult males had the bad habit of f***ing any female (or, if none were to be found, younger males and this is crucial here) when they were horny.

And remember too, this was still the world in which Sarah was Abraham's half-sister! So all the other strictures of that chapter, most of which we now call common sense, were quite necessary!

18:22 is necessary for starting to build at least an idea of common male dignity--that is, you don't use a male as you would a female. In that time and place, both males may have been killed because you don't want anyone getting used to that either way. ESPECIALLY when your people are, in a world without WMDs, 'the smallest of the small'. Which means, every member of the nation who can reproduce better do so early and often. How much of this background is still present today? Not much, I'd say. Think again.